Recently I watched Being Serena – Her Story, her words. HBO documentary. I think its been out for a month or so. I do not watch much TV but since many of us were home, I decided to indulge! Before I criticize her (yep, you may hate me after reading this) I was amazed at how bad-ass she is, how much she works out, stays conditioned – even during her entire pregnancy! In fact, did you know she won the grand opening while being pregnant? Whoa, I actually believe this puts her in a category all her own. That accomplishment does not deserve the same trophy as everyone else…unless they were pregnant too. Although, I do not believe competition in our third trimester is exactly what women need at this time, ha.
Anyway, I bring this up because I have gained a lot of strength on a personal level knowing Serena’s story, which represented to me being a sexy bitch, wining, not caring about haters, and killing my success no matter what. Her father touches my heart too but I digress…this is not about her dad, unfortunately.
The first episode of this show triggered me so bad that I had to immediately shut off my computer – I mean, I slammed it shut! I’ll explain…you see as a Yoni Egg author and entrepreneur I have learned that I have an aversion to witnessing women handing over their Yoni power to anyone like they would know better…like a doctor!
But let me back up and explain the conversation that primed my triggering point. Serena was sitting with her midwife a week before her expected due date. It appeared like it was their first time meeting ever and I was like, what! I wish she would have called me [crying for Yoni]. You see, Serena was saying throughout the entire episode, “I just want to do what is best for my baby” and I am sure that is true. So why was the first time Serena said to her midwife was “Can we just do a cesarean to avoid the pain of vaginal birth?”. I was like, is this a serious question! I thought you wanted what was best for your baby, that would NOT include a commodified cesarean. Babies need, (1) to be coated with vaginal mucus for kick starting their immune system, (2) they need to exercise their lungs, (3) triumph over their first challenge (4) connect to their mother’s north star directional breathing, (5) deepen connection to their mother, (6) pass the vaginal gateway as the hallmark of the portal into life.
But guess what, her midwife did not say any of their things as a means of convincing Serena for the betterment of her baby to have a vaginal birth – you know what she said to her, “cesareans take longer to recuperate from and you do not have that kind of time”…uh, the anger in me arose more…
“A doctor birthing for you, Serena for their comfort is not good for your baby”, I screamed at my screen! I was pissed, then it got worst. She gets in the car with her husband, who really loves her hard (I loved that!) and says, “well the doctor said ‘it’s time’ so it’s time”. Are you serious, you’re giving your baby’s first choice of power, which is when she arrives into the planet over to your doctor? As a woman and Yoni Goddess, I was pissed. But then I realized how we as women over many generations have handed our power, in good faith, over to the patriarchal hospital systems where we lay down, instead of move around; go into trance, instead of being drugged; feel in control of our Yoni instead of insecure.
The medicalization of birth is a trauma of giving away our number one soulful skill that we are still recuperating from as women. And unfortunately, Serena represents us as women. The fast pace, over-accomplished woman who does not know her greatest power, her Yoni. So acommplished we lose our greatest force, our vaginal force!
Unfortunately doctors have become gods in our modern American culture, and as Yoni Egg users we are learning that the true god is not a anyone outside of us, it is perhaps the force that flips our baby unsidedown and breaks our water, that selects all of the specific genes our baby inherits, that provides us the ability to our baby to mimic our breathing after birth, that allows our baby to fall asleep with our heatbeat.
Why must birthing be easy? Why are we uncomfortable getting sensually weird during birth? I would argue that vaginal birth is an initiation. Instead of running away from using our power, use each menstrual cycle as an opportnity to learn how to birth your blood without medication, try just rubbing your womb briskly and breathing hard during your cramps (mini contractions) and gain momentum into your vaginal awareness. Get sensually weird and embrace your Yoni, have fun, and cry if the pain is too deep. These are all our powers as women that allow us to see visions and feel the moment ahead before it happens. Do not ever give that away!